Well done - and thanks to you all

Some fantastic news in today's Bury Free Press:

The Bury Free Press Beat It! appeal sailed through its £55,000 target this week – thanks to our generous readers.

On Tuesday, the St Edmund’s Wheel fund-raising group’s three wise men, trustees Ian Turner, Brian Hurrell and Steve Laycock, presented £10,000 to take us beyond the £55,000 minimum we hoped to raise for a prostate cancer probe for West Suffolk Hospital.

Steve said: “Having the opportunity to exceed the target we thought would be a great way to end the year.”

With more still coming in – the total now stands at £58,000 – any extra cash will fund further enhancements to the equipment.

Editor Barry Peters said: “This was always going to be a huge sum to raise in a year, but the community took Beat It! to its heart. I want to thank everyone who donated.”

Yes, our Beat It! appeal has overtaken its £55,000 target.

It seemed a huge amount when we decided at the beginning of the year to raise the money to buy West Suffolk Hospital a prostate cancer probe but readers and local organisations took the appeal to heart.

St Edmund’s Wheel gave us an amazing £10,000 donation. But do not give up if you have money raised for the appeal because it is still welcome. There are additional costs which the hospital would have had to cover had we only raised £55,000.

Dave Gooderham, fund-raising manager for the hospital, said: “The astounding generosity shown by the public in raising even more than £55,000 allows us to further enhance the care and services we can offer to patients living with prostate cancer.”

The new machine will give higher resolution scans than the current equipment, enabling staff to better target biopsies to treat the cancer.

Each year, 40,000 men in the UK are diagnosed with prostate cancer, which kills about one an hour. But Beat It! has not only raised money,  it has raised awareness.

Urology nurse practitioner Kay Trabucchi said: “I do the rapid access clinics and guys have come along recently who have been encouraged to do so by the campaign .”

For many donating to Beat It!, prostate cancer was more than statistics.  Just two weeks after the appeal began, Barrow Bowls Club gave £900 and treasurer Valerie Wyatt said: “Quite a few of our members have been affected by prostate cancer in some way.”

Sadly, several donations came from funeral collections.

But there was a fun side to fund-raising, too. The Woolpit Drama Club’s naked ambition in staging Calendar Girls raised £2,500.

In April, St Edmund’s Wheel held its first fund-raiser, with round-Bury rides of 15 to 100 miles. Later it held an off-road ride in King’s Forest.

In July, West Suffolk Hospital, St Edmunds Round Table and West Suffolk Hospital held a highly successful Bury It’s a Knockout competition.

That was typical of fund-raisers’ inventiveness. The hospital’s IT team cycled the equivalent of London to Le Mans in 24 hours on machines in the staff restaurant. On Saturday, 30 walkers, runners and joggers completed the 10km for 10 days challenge — they have raised between £1,500 and £2,000.

We even had racing pigs when the new Bury St Edmunds Lions Club held an electronic pig racing night.

Beat It! was also part of the Hospital Charity event in the arc last Saturday with the chance to have your picture taken in a Jordan Formula One car. Between the arc and a bucket collection at Bury Rugby Club, we raised £850. Saturday’s event also raised money for the Breast Cancer Campaign and Operation Jordan, a fund for a £50,000 operation for Bury boy Jordan Chaplin, who has cerebral palsy.

You can still donate to Beat It! at www.justgiving.com/BFP-Beat-It or by using your green token in Bury Waitrose’s Community Matters charities box.

A week to go...

Little did I imagine back in January that I'd be sitting here today a slimmer soul.

Inches have melted from my waist and precious pressure has eased from my veins. Heck, I've even bought some clothing without an 'X' anywhere on its label.

Ok, this time next week (barring a trip to the chippie) I'll be more than £100 worse off but I would have happily coughed up that amount back in January (you may recall I pledged £2 for every lb I lost...that equates to about 56lb so £112 as of today).

Yesterday, I received the draft from the nice people at Abbeycroft of my poster campaign: yes, I'm one of the new cover stars for their Inspire campaign. So when you see my ugly mug imploring you to exercise, don't just dismiss it. If I can do it, anyone can...and that means you.

Eat less, exercise more and reshape your life. That's what Smiling Assassin Helen Bye told me back in January. She was smiling then and I don't think she thought I could do it. But thanks to her, the lovely team at Abbeycroft and all of you who have sponsored me for our Beat It! appeal, I've pretty much got where I wanted for 2013. That's Helen, below, posing for the camera in full make-up.

I've huffed and puffed. I've sweated and looked very silly doing things at the gym which a man of 48 just shouldn't do. I'd like to apologise, too, to all the proper gym-goers for my lack of fitness back in January and for leaving so much sweat everywhere.

My defining moments have been numerous.

- Dropping one trouser size was great - but falling a shocking 12 inches to fit in 36 Next jeans was a dream come true.

- Running. Yes, running. Just a few weeks ago, I felt like running, so I did. Just for 30 seconds, but I ran. And I smiled so much afterwards I strained my facial muscles. I now run for 8 mins or so on the treadmill and am building that up gradually.

- My old mum. For years, she'd been chuffing on about how large I'd got. Now she says I shouldn't lose any more. Well, you can't win 'em all!

My one remaining aim this year is to see the Beat It! appeal reach that magical £55,000 mark. We've hit the £50k mark so there's a little push to go and we may just get there. That would make the whole year seem so worthwhile so please back the final few bits of fund-raising across the town this week.

For 2014, I'll be a paying member of the gym. I've said I want to lose a further 2 stones and will need to keep going to maintain where I've got to and push on further. Abbeycroft have been so supportive this year with their support in financing my year that I owe it to them as much as anyone to keep training.

So, sorry gym-bunnies, you ain't seen the last of me waving my butt around the mats or teetering on the edge of collapse on the treadmill. But you love me really...don't you?

Ride on time

Great spread of pictures in the Bury Free Press today about the St Edmunds Wheel bike ride last Sunday.

As promised, I did the 15-mile ride (which, thanks organisers, was actually about 17 miles!). More than 700 took part and my favourite sight was that of the family of four on one bike. Amazing!

Smiling Assassin and Son No2 pushed and pushed me and even pointed me in the right direction when I took a wrong turn in Hessett. 17 miles is plenty without adding distance after all.

I was helped on the route by the nice Claire Robinson, from the T-shirt shop Tee-s in Langton Place, Bury ( http://www.etsy.com/shop/TEEsCoUk ) who produced this stunning appeal shirt for me to wear. Thanks for your support, Claire!

For those who took part, thanks very much. The weather was cool and breezy - ideal for cycling.

Thanks, too, to Steve, Ian and Brian - the organisers and founders of St Edmunds Wheel. This year will have seen them smash through the £200,000 barrier of fund-raising. If ever a local trio deserved an honour, it's these guys for the months of hard work they put in each year to raise cash for good causes. This year, a portion of the money raised will go to our Beat It appeal.

Plug me in and watch me go

This was the scene...before Smiling Assassin (aka Helen Bye) came away beaming.

"But you're normal!" she shrieked.

It's taken a few months, much sweat, humiliation, early mornings, more sweat. But finally, there's a chink showing there.

"Great," I said - now can you unhook me from the power grid?

As part of Abbeycroft Leisure's commitment to me for 2013's Bury Free Press Beat It appeal (you can find details of my fund-raising at justgiving.com/BfpEditor ), I'm getting the services of a fitness instructor and their lovely Western Way gym for free.

Part of that offer though is the Bodystat - a series of tests to determine how much lean mass I have, my peak flow (!), my body make-up and the like. You have little sticky pads stuck in places no-one should see but your mother and close friends and a current is passed through your limbs. I now know what a piece of chicken must feel like on a George Foreman grill.

Anyhow, suffice to say I haven't grown over the past four and half months. Boo.But I have taken 10% off my body fat and lost more than 20kgs.

The success Smiling Assassin was celebrating was my blood pressure. Abbeycroft are meticulous in checking everyone who starts exercising with regards to BP to ensure they are fit to exercise. I was on the borderline so went back to my GP and carried out home tests before being allowed to train. My readings in January were high. The result of the training and weight loss is that my BP is now in normal ranges, which is good news.

The flip of this came in the sucker punch from Ms Bye.

"Now we can get you ripped on the free weights. You wanna be ripped dontcha?"

Mmm. Let's see. There's ripped and ripped.

I don't mind Brad Pitt in Fight Club, but Arnie and Sly? No thanks. So I'm going to have to be careful and not let her get too carried away. I'm not doing steroids and I'm not doing protein shakes. Beyond that, I'll lift a few of those teeny weeny weights with all my might.

Oh - and my peak flow. Don't worry - it's nothing to do with my pee output thankfully. It's a measure of lung power and mine are firing on all cylinders. You simply blow into a contraption similar to an empty toilet roll and a slider moves to indicate your power. I cracked this one very early on - simply have a magnet with you and at the critical point, hold it at the end of the tube.

You'll get maximum points each time...kerching!

Another milestone

Here's my problem...

The reason you've had no progress for the past month or so is because of guilt.

I thought a trip to the States would derail all my progress...I thought I would have to come back to you a broken man...I thought I'd be under the Smiling Assassin for years after a trip to Bubba Gump's Shrimp Co.

I thought wrong, I'm pleased to say.

The Bury Free Press Beat It appeal is at least £84 to the good from my pocket alone ... not only did I lose another half a stone in the US, but another half fell off somewhere else in the past month to take me sailing past the three stones mark.

Smiling Assassin thought I'd blob out while across the 'Pond' and I think it was as much as to prove her wrong as anything else.

So on we go - halfway to my 6 stone target.

It's back to the gym this week and I should check out their rather natty machines to see if they play movies (sorry, films).

While at Bubba Gump's, I had the rip taken out of somewhat mercilessly.

It transpires I'm not very well versed in the world of film. You see Bubba Gump is from the Forrest Gump film reference, which stars Tom Hanks, apparently. And I haven't seen the film. Cue laughter.

Neither have I seen any of the Star Wars films, Pulp Fiction, Mary Poppins or Schindler's List.

I'm up to date with my Rocky and my Die Hard. And James Bond could be my specialist subject on Mastermind. But I may need to get along to Orange Wednesdays more often to hit the classics.

Life's like a box of chocolates, as they say.

And that was that...

January 28, 2013. I stood atop those pesky scales in Abbeycroft's gym.

Smiling Assassin took a look and gave me one of those knowing stares.

But here we are, 84 days later and TWO STONES LIGHTER!

Yes...high fives in the gym today for all of five seconds.

The Smiling Assassin turned to me and said: "Right, Monday, body statistics again and then we'll set you a new set of goals for the rest of the year. Peak flow; waist; body make-up."

I trudged off to the showers (minus the Smiling Assassin).

This next few months could be interesting. I've been coasting up to now and sweating just to make it look like I'm really trying hard. Now, I suspect, the training's going to start to hurt.

On the plus side, at £2 for every pound shed, that's a sweet £56 I'll pop into the Beat It! campaign and we're well on our way to £10k.

Preparations are well under way for our great May raffle to win a Vauxhall Corsa, so keep your eyes peeled for the car and raffle tickets across town.

I'm off for a big packet of crisps...

Getting active

Abbeycroft Leisure - those nice people who run the gym at Bury Leisure Centre - are supporting me on this fitness challenge and the Beat It! appeal.

It was back in June that Abbeycroft launched a borough-wide campaign to promote the benefits of physical activity on wellbeing and quality of life called Active St Eds. At the time, I could not have imagined I would be part of that...

Now that campaign has been extended to patients and visitors at West Suffolk Hospital in Bury St Edmunds.

Posters and the new ‘Active St Eds Inspire Me’ magazine will now go on display in staff areas, the Time Out restaurant, occupational health and outpatients area.

Michelle Banfield-Curran, Abbeycroft’s Partnership Manager, said: “We want to thank West Suffolk Hospital for its support of this very important campaign to raise awareness of the benefits of physical activity, not only on fitness but on people’s general well being.

“It is our hope that a lasting legacy from last year’s Olympic and Paralympic Games will be that more people in St Edmundsbury take up some form of activity and that the poster campaign, featuring real life stories from our community will inspire people and show them how their friends, neighbours and colleagues did it.”

To help measure the success of the campaign, a new ‘Active Points’ scheme was introduced at Abbeycroft Leisure where people can collect points every time they take part in an activity at Abbeycroft’s Centres in Bury St Edmunds and Haverhill or at one of their many events and activities held in the community, which can be redeemed against 400 retailers online. 

The campaign ‘Active St Eds’ web portal www.acleisure.com/active-st-eds features real life stories of people from St Edmundsbury whose lives have been improved by physical activity, tips, articles written by local healthcare experts, and details of how to sign up for Active Points.

Claire Webb, Health and Wellbeing Coordinator at West Suffolk Hospital NHS Trust, said: “We are delighted to support the Active St Eds Campaign, we take the health and wellbeing of our staff very seriously at West Suffolk Hospital and we’re actively encouraging them to sign up. It is so important to maintain a healthy lifestyle and to keep fit and active; hopefully Active St Eds will encourage more local people to increase the amount of exercise they do each week.”

Abbeycroft manages both Haverhill and Bury St Edmunds Leisure Centres in partnership with St Edmundsbury Borough Council and delivers much of the Sports Development and outreach work in the Borough.

Did you know, too, that Abbeycroft Leisure opened its first budget gym in the heart of Ipswich in Suffolk in January 2011, offering state-of-the-art workout stations for just £12.99. Abbeycroft is one of a handful of leisure trusts in the UK to branch out and develop this affordable fitness model.   

0.6

Doesn't seem much, does it.

When I stand on the scales on Monday morning, I'm hoping they will read 0.6kg less than a couple of weeks ago - and that will be my initial target achieved of a couple of stones lost.

Sadly, Smiling Assassin Helen Bye has said I can't just top and go back to my usual healthy diet of crisps, crisps and more crisps (with a few crisps sprinkled on top). Oh no, she's got me signed up until the end of December...saying I'm just a third of the way to my real target.

But she has promised me some ridge crisps for Christmas. She's all heart.

My progress was noticed by Bury Free Press news editor Lesley Anslow this week in a backhanded way.

"Oi - you need  to get a smaller shirt," she said.

Progress indeed.

Heidi Hi (2)

I'm looking forward to welcoming three new faces to the gym in the coming weeks.

Today's Bury Free Press has the story on page 11 - here's the long and short of it:


A trio of Bury Free Press reading gym-dodgers are getting set to dust off their sweatbands and leotards as they take on a fitness challenge.
Mark Thompson, Nicola Buckle and Heather Bream have taken up the Active St Eds gauntlet after winning Abbeycroft Leisure’s competition to win a 12-month gym membership and help from a fitness instructor - worth nearly £500.
The trio will be joined in the gym by Bury Free Press  editor, Barry Peters, as he continues his challenge to lose as much weight as possible for our Beat It! Appeal.
The winners bagged their membership after convincing us  and Abbeycroft Leisure that they were looking to get active.
Ms Buckle, 26, from Brandon, said she had been fit while at school, but had put on weight after the death of her father.
“I have been trying to lose weight for about seven years and I’ve tried different things that haven’t worked - I felt like I needed some help,” she said.
Ms Bream, 36, from Bury, said she had last been a gym member 10 years ago, but family life had knocked her fitness regime.
“I have had three children and never managed to get my fitness back.
“The problem is that I’m rubbish at exercise and eat too much chocolate!” she said.
Mr Thompson, 50, from the Bury area, said he wanted to get back in shape after ‘letting myself go’.
“I had hip surgery around 10 years ago and I’ve put on a lot of weight since.
“I find it very daunting to go in the  gym because I’m not that way inclined but this was a good way to get fit again,” he said.
Helen Bye, fitness instructor - who has been dubbed ‘the Smiling Assassin’ by Mr Peters due to her gruelling workouts - will be taking the winners through their paces.
She said: “We’ll give them each a tailored programme to get the most out of their time here and it will be tough - there will definitely be some mild discomfort at first!
“Hopefully these guys can be an inspiration to people who don’t feel like they can get out there and get fit.”

Here's our pics:

                                        NO PAIN, NO GAIN: Mark Thompson, Heather Bream
                                        and Nicola Buckle with Abbeycroft Leisure fitness instructor
                                        Helen Bye



My earlier post about Heidi will hopefully now become obvious - just take a look at the Smiling Assassin's hair...well she can be cruel to me every week, so I thought I'd get a little bit of revenge in.

Notice, too, how she's smiling in every picture - she's looking forward to being just as mean to them as she is to me.

Good luck Mark, Heather and Nicola - please come and say Hi in the gym if you notice me coughing and spluttering on some piece of equipment - I'm usually too puffed out to notice anything other than my water bottle.

Crunch time

If I'm honest, the hardest thing about this Beat It! challenge is giving up crisps.

I love them in every shape and form.

Not so keen on Wotsits, but French Fries, pretzels, Quavers, Frazzles (especially), Monster Munch and then  those ridged ones just hit the button every time. I went to teh US last year, though, and had a proper pretzel - there's no comparison to those supermarket packets and something I year to try again (out of sight of the Smiling Assassin, of course and with no camera evidence).

Then there's Pringles, cheese and onion, those nice Sensations, prawn cocktail...the list goes on.

Alarming then this week when I heard that Britons polish off six billion packets of crisps each year...almost 100 packets per person.

Rather more alarming - and something which supports my zero tolerance approach, is the fact that snacking on just one packet a day can add up to the equivalent of drinking almost FIVE LITRES of cooking oil per year to someone's diet.
 Put like that, I might just have to continue with the abstinence...though one packet of ridged salted vinegar can't hurt that much, can it?

( . ) Another milestone this week - tipped the scales having lost a further 2kg, so that's now 12kg lost in total.

( . ) If you'd like to support my fund-raising via my gym sessions courtesy of the nice people at  Abbeycroft Leisure, pop on the web to www.justgiving.com/BfpEditor where you can donate to the Beat It appeal. We're trying to raise £55k to buy a cancer scanner to detect prostate problems early in young men - and save lives.

Please help - just helping one young man and his family will have made all the sweating (and shouting from the Smiling Assassin) worth it.

Thank you for your support so far!

Worrying fact #1

One doughnut has the same calorific content as four skinless chicken breasts.

So if there is a God, why did he/she allow Mankind to invent them?

The hills . . .

No not those hills (the TV brats), the hills of Bury St Edmunds.

Amazed? Flat Suffolk? Think again.

It was yesterday when I had the rather silly idea of biking to work again in preparation for the Bury Bike Ride on June 9. Smiling Assassin (and sometime gym instructor Helen Bye) and her family have signed on the dotted line so failure is not an option.

The organisers have invested in CCTV for 2013 to track my every move - Steve Laycock nearly choked on his cup of tea when I rolled home before everyone else in the 15-miler last year. He was convinced I'd hidden in some ditch on Moreton Hall, waited an hour and then freewheeled down Mount Road back to the Abbey Gardens to make sure I got a nice shiny medal.

So I thought I'd better get back in the saddle. They start us off on the  Mount Road mountain most years just to try to weed me out - thinking I'm going to (a) fall off while going up or (b) collapse. So far, I've managed to escape both outcomes.

So WD40, a bit of Muc-Off spray and a re-inflation of my tyres later and I was ready to roll.

Boy was yesterday cold though. Foolishly, I donned shorts for the 7am sortie into town and regretted it the moment the wind started blowing in places I'd forgotten existed (err, Eastgate Street...nothing rude passes my fingers on this work keyboard).

Some kind soul captured me on camera...there's work to do from the Smiling Assassin and her bosses at Abbeycroft Leisure in the next 2 months.

My aim is to get to the Sir Chris Hoy look. I'm guessing I need a few more weights sessions in the meantime?

But at least those nice Abbeycroft Leisure people - training me to support our Bury Free Press Beat It appeal - have got me a spanking new jersey to wear on the roads.

Thanks team - see you on the start line!

Heidi Hi

No words are needed...but you might want to check the Bury Free Press on Friday and see if you can spot any similarities.

Thanks, kids

At last...

It's taken 8 gym sessions (is that all? Really? It seems much more) but I've worked out how to defeat the Smiling Assassin.

No, it's not a crafty choccie biscuit in the staff room, nor is it a rippling-muscled torso of a man on the free weights.

What really takes her attention away is one of the little people. Kids. Children, Bambinos. Infants.

She was all of a flutter on Monday morning when I'd collapsed in a heap on the rower after lasting the requisite 10 minutes. She had some new gym buddies coming in at 10.30am - a class of reception pupils.
They had asked to see how the machines worked as they were working on this in class.

She was upbeat. I was still sweating and trying to down just a little bit of water in my 'active rest' period inbetween some hideous contortions on the TRX thingy.

And then it happened - 10am came around and I was just drawing in what felt like my final breath when another fit gym type came round the corner with the news (slipping on my sweat and carefully stepping over my now-dehydrated body on the floor).

"The kids are here."

Smiling Assassin looked up. She smiled (even though she's called the SA, she rarely smiles now after that euphoric first week when she couldn't stop smiling, or rather laughing). She looked at me.

Magnanimous, I thought. Magnanimous will work.

"Look, why don't you go and be with the little people - they need you more than me and you can't have them running around because of health and safety issues," I stuttered.

Kerching!

The combination of the frustrated teacher / health and safety worked a treat. And off she trotted after I promised to do the 50 more TRX exercise thingies (pulling and pushing some long straps inbetween my hands and generally looking like I'm trapped in a spider's web).

I placed myself strategically around the Abbeycroft Leisure facilities as she showed the little people round. And it worked a treat...I had a lovely relaxing session after that - able to both breathe and take on board water. Result.

"This is Barry - he's going slowly on the rower because he's old and probably looks like one of your great grand-dads," she laughed, encouraging me to rip a muscle in my wrist as I went as fast as I could to show off.

So, teachers of West Suffolk: Please feel free to let me know if your class would like to pop round the gym area and I'll happily slot you in during my weekly session. Ask for Helen. She'll be delighted. So will I...

Getting competitive

Make a note - the It's A Bury Knockout takes place on Hardwick Heath on Sunday, July 14.

It's a great day out and you'll have great fun - I reckon Smiling Assassin is entering in an Abbeycroft Leisure side so you'll see what I've had to endure all these weeks.

All funds from the day will go to the Bury Free Press Beat It! appeal, so please support it.

The real competition, however, takes place a few weeks before July 14. I'll be at peak fitness by then so I've hit on the idea of an It's A Barry Knockout. No, Smiling Assassin isn't going to sock me with a pair of boxing gloves (though heaven knows, I'm sure she'd like to). No, this is about me and she competing over a few easy events to see who gets bragging rights for the remainder of the year. It's like Man U vs Man City, Spurs v Arsenal, Editor v Assassin.

The good thing is - I get to choose the events.

Now, I'm okay at chess (I know the Najdorf Variation and the Sicilian Defence). I can pretty much defeat allcomers at Mariokart on the Nintendo64. And I'm a whizz when it comes to juggling. But I'm thinking Smiling Assassin might expect something a little more strenuous.

So, I propose three of the following:

- A gym row-off (2,000m, fastest wins);

- A 50m race in the Abbeycroft Leisure pool;

- 100m sprint on the Abbeycroft track (that's me celebrating above - I'm built for speed not endurance after all);

- A game of squash;

- 9 holes of golf.

Over to you Smiling Assassin - you get to pick.

I'll confirm the details next week.

Meantime, check out the real It's A Bury Knockout here http://www.buryknockout.com/

Sorry, officer

My first takeaway in ages went down a treat on Saturday night. Thank you Zen.

The trouble I had actually picking up the takeaway could have landed in a police cell though for public indecency.

Abbeygate Street was still gated off as we drove to the noodle bar - so we had to hovver outside The Angel and I ran down to Zen (well, walked very fast...Smiling Assassin hasn't let me loose on running yet though I can sort of remember doing it once as a teenager).

Halfway there, I noticed the temperature had dropped markedly...as had my jeans. I'd thrown an old pair on before rushing out the door and not really taken notice of their size.

They were at half mast - I checked behind before dragging them up and making sure I was decent before entering a crowded restaurant. Once in, I noticed a stray fiver on the floor near the counter but daren't bend down to pick it up in case I embarrassed myself (and put the diners off their noodles as my noddle broke free. I mouthed to the waitress to grab the cash and she did - while I kept my hands firmly in my pockets for added support.

I made a hasty retreat and got home without further incident. The jeans are now waiting for one of those charity clothes bags and I'm eyeing up a nice new pair for the summer.

Expensive process, this weight loss.

Please help me

I am losing my mind.

Today, Emma Lake (@BfpEmma for those of a Twitter persuasion) brought in a fab-looking cake. She's done the same for most of the last 3-4 weeks as she's taking part in the Great Suffolk Bake-off. She won the Bury round - the final in Ipswich is on Saturday.

Anyhow, I declined politely - only to be told by all and sundry that it was the best cake they had tasted.

Cheers team.

The those nice people at the arc Nando's called. They were delivering some lunchtime treats. Salds (with dressing), and chicken and stuff. Mmmm. But again, I declined. Everyone told me how nice it all was.

Cheers, team.

So I nipped to Boots. Among the lovely looking wraps and crisps was a lonely little cous cous salad. Not many calories - even less as I left off the dressing.

I also bought nuts, pulses, herbs and vegetables from Waitrose. Now, I am convinced I'm losing the plot.

Dear Smiling Assassin...I wish to complain about the brainwashing effect you are having on me. No crisps, no choccie, no alcohol and no biscuits or cake. That can't be good for a chap.

Dear Support Meeting...My name is Barry. I'm a veggie-holic.

The perfect 10

Somehow, it happened. Officially, I'm a double-digit loser.

Today was BodyStat (body statistics) check-in day and the one which sees me plugged into the mains for a few minutes while my hair stands on end. (Ok, it's not that serious, but you get the idea).

I've somehow lost a couple of percentage points in body fat and 8cms have gone from my waist. Not sure where these are - perhaps I lost them in the changing room.

BMI has also dropped a couple of points while the biggest recognisable figure is that big 10 - 10 kilos of weight shed (that's 22lbs in old money and just 6lbs short of my initial target).

Rather helpfully, Smiling Assassin (aka Helen Bye, personal trainer and sort-of good egg) also added in her best doctor's handwriting scrawl that I had 20kg still to lose (that's 3 stone). Thanks H.

Smiling Assassin was mostly on best behaviour today - introducing me to both the kettle bells and the kit bag. The kit bag is as it sounds - a heavy bag with straps which you flock up on to your arms and then back down). 

The kettle bells, however, have potential for major internal organ damage if you get the timing wrong. You swing them from between your legs (it's very elegant, as you can imagine) up to the point where your arms are pointing straight out in front of you. Repeat for 30 seconds. If you spot me holding one, stand well back for a few weeks until I get the hang of them.

The only thing which had really gone up noticeably on my BodyStat ("The truth about your body composition") was my age.

If you'd like to support my fund-raising via these gym sessions courtesy of the nice people at  Abbeycroft Leisure, pop on the web to www.justgiving.com/BfpEditor where you can donate to the Beat It appeal. We're trying to raise £55k to buy a cancer scanner to detect prostate problems early in young men - and save lives.

Please help - just helping one young man and his family will have made all the sweating (and shouting from the Smiling Assassin) worth it.

Thank you for your support so far!

Lent

This weekend will be a real hoot.

Mothering Sunday, teenage boys and the delight of a new BodyStat on Monday.

Mothering Sunday will be fine - "All I want is a fiver in my card". Job done. Card sent. Just the journey there and back.

Teenage boys? Bit more effort required. Lots of clearing up (how much toothpaste can one 18-year-old get through? Does he eat it?), lots of food to prepare and lots of shirts to iron (Yes, the hot, triangular thingy is called an iron...)

BodyStat is the one I'm dreading.

As Smiling Assassin re-emerged from her icky little bed this week, the looming BodyStat came to her mind.

"Have a good weekend" (so far so good, I thought) "...and don't eat or drink anything bad. It'll all show in the tests on Monday."

Aw, thanks. Friday night is crisps night. One big bag of ridge crisps. All mine. Goodbye to that treat then.

Saturday night is drinks night. Goodbye to that as well.

Monday means no breakfast, no tea or coffee 4 hours beforehand and just sips of water. Then its plug me into the mains, run a current through and see me light up and count the hairs which burn. Well, sort of.

It's pinch this, measure that, blow in here ... it's like a human MoT. Without the tyre change. Though I've got plenty of spare tyres in case they're needed.

So, hope you have a great weekend.

By the way, Smiling Assassin also managed to read my last post about her not being able to keep up with me. Now she's going to push me harder and make me weep (again).

I saw that nice fitness manager boss of hers, Matt Hickey, in the gym today and he asked how I was doing.

"Fine thanks, that Helen is a great instructor - you've taught her well," I said (through gritted teeth). I might have to drop him a confidential email if Monday proves too tough ( or worse still, Smiling Assassin tries to ban all crisps...)

Lightweight

When I started this fitness lark, I looked up to my personal trainer.

She was the pinnacle of fitness. My guru. Abbeycroft Leisure's version of Wonderwoman (without the Spandex).

This week, she showed a slight chink in that armour. She cried off Monday's #fitnotfat session. yes, she was very apologetic and made up some reason about being a little bit icky.

As I pulled and pushed on the TRX machine, the seated rower and sorted out my glutes (for glutes, read backside - I had to ask, too), I chuckled to myself in self-congratulation. I knew why she cancelled.

She can't keep up with me any more . . .

Now fitness ( or rather the lack of it) is like smoking/drinking/womanising (not sure I know everything about all of those, but I have experience of each). Admitting you have a problem is the first step on a long journey.

Come on, Smiling Assassin. Admit it ... that boxing session on Friday did you in, eh!